Depending on one’s age, Christmas can be the delight of a young child or the host to hordes of family members. As time goes on, one loses loved ones and eventually faces an empty nest brought on by college, jobs, and possibly marriage. Of course, we all want our children to succeed and be happy, but at times the house seems to echo, and the Christmas season can turn that echo into a sad longing for those long-ago busy days. Maybe…..or maybe not.
Husband Dan and I no longer have family members who live in town. Visiting our family involves long car rides or long airplane flights. With our boys married, they must juggle two sets of parents, with the solution being parental rotation for Thanksgiving and Christmas. As one becomes the elders of the group, the holidays become the perview of our adult kids. They are the ones who clean the house, drag out the decorations, plan the menu, and anxiously watch the turkey in the oven, only to suddenly notice the rolls are burning. One helps or offers to help, but one’s main job is to entertain the grandchild. Patience and smiles come easily without the daily job of raising the child, and the joy of sprinkling a little stardust into our grandchildren’s lives is well worth the time.
In the midst of one’s longing for the old days, it’s easy to forget the weight of celebrations, the anxious hope that things will go well. Juggling tasks and responsibilities, doing the just plain hard work now belongs to others. As the elders, all we have to do is show up and bring a smile. Just like childhood, the celebrations are in the hands of others, and while we may bring a dish or two, all we really do is eat good food, catch up with relatives and friends, and hug everybody. Blue Christmas? I don’t think so.
Cindy Arp, teacher/librarian, retired from Knox County Schools. She and husband Dan live in Heiskell.
